Tuesday, October 26, 2010

My heart is breaking

  It's breaking for my Dad and Step-mom (Suzette). Let me backtrack just a tad. My mom and dad were never married. If it wasn't for Suzette and my grandpa (my dad's father) I probably wouldn't have ever met my Dad. It was them who encouraged my Dad to have a relationship with me. I remember finding a letter a few years back from my GPM ( it stands for Grandpa Molina, he's been signing cards and gifts like that for years) and Grandma apologizing for the way my father was acting for not reaching out to my mother and helping her. Since then my Dad has been in my life along with Suzette. She's definitely been a second mother to me. Actually, there are no places when it comes to my Mother and Suzette. They've both equally been mothers me. My mom isn't one for talking about sex or my period and boys. Suzette was who I went to for that. Well, I didn't go to her about sex but you get the point. She's been awesome. I love her to death. I always joked around that if my Dad and her split up that she would most definitely still be in my life.

  Well, last Thursday I had just sat down to do my final. Before I even started I got a call from my Dad. He said he was on his way to Fort Worth and saw the exit for Killeen and thought about me. He had called to catch up. He casually mentioned that Suzette had moved into her new house. I said, "Excuse me?" He got extremely quiet for a few seconds. He said, "Oh, you didn't know? I though I had told you. I'm so sorry sweetie but we split up." My heart dropped to my stomach. Tears started welling up in my eyes and I got choked up. All I could say was I'm sorry. I didn't know what else to say. We talked about how he moved into an apartment and that the kids are still living with Suzette. Our conversation was then over. Just like that I find out my parents are divorcing. He even mentioned he had been moved out since September 14th and I'm just now finding out!! He says they're going to try and work things out but I know they won't. Secretly I had a feeling a while back that it was going to happen.

  It's really just now sinking in. I keep wondering about my brother and sister. I wonder what we'll do for Thanksgiving. I wonder what we'll do for Christmas. I wonder what will happen when I get married. I know I'll still invite her but will it be weird for them? I hope this divorce doesn't turn nasty. I hope my brother and sister aren't hurting too much.

  I know I am.


Kayla Sue said... [Reply to comment]

Aw, so sorry :( I wish I knew what to say... hope things look up soon.

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